No one likes divorce. No one goes into marriage thinking about divorce. That’s why this blogpost subject is hard to write about. And yet, according to the divorce specialists at www.DivorceMag.com, the incidence of divorce drops by up to 30% among couples who get pre-marital counseling.
Most couples get marriage counseling when things start to go wrong in their marriage. Problems emerge when couples don’t communicate well; when they can’t resolve conflicts effectively; and when they don’t share common expectations.
These common problems are fixable, and even better, can be greatly reduced or even avoided with pre-marital counseling.
Marriages have common flash points, such as:
- Money issues.
- Family planning.
- Infidelity.
- Sex and intimacy.
- Forgiveness.
- Humility.
Broadly speaking, you’ll find two types of pre-marital counseling: secular and religious.
How do you find a good secular counselor? Check out the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy (www.aamft.org). They provide links to credentialed professionals in your area.
You can find a variety of religious counselors depending on your particular religious affiliation. The largest one is the Catholic Church’s Pre-Cana courses required of all Catholics planning to get married in a Catholic church.
Pre-Cana courses focus on:
√ Spirituality/faith
√ Conflict resolution skills
√ Careers
√ Finances
√ Intimacy/cohabitation
√ Children
√ Commitment
Where the church sees spiritual beauty in marriage, the medical community sees good health. Married couples are healthier and happier than their single or co-habitating counterparts. That’s why America’s leading medical institute, the Mayo Clinic, also recommends pre-marital counseling.
Stress and conflict aren’t conducive to good health. Pre-marital counseling reduces both to unleash the full, therapeutic benefits of marriage.
As you plan your wedding day, consider pre-marriage counseling. Do you need it? Maybe not, but your relationship is so worth it.
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